If you thought your life was busy,sleeping naked sex videos you have nothing on this cuddly cat that has two -- yes TWO -- jobs.
The black and white cat, nicknamed Kyle by locals, has recently taken on the important job of patrolling the Hyndland station in Glasgow, Scotland, and protecting its travelers.
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According to STV, Kyle cuddles up to passengers on their commutes and loves a few good scratchies from those he's guarding.
But don't pick him up -- he doesn't like that.
Katy Hanlon, who works in the station's coffee kiosk said, "He is super friendly, he'll plonk himself down in the middle of the path or he'll follow people until he gets attention. He gets really excited when he sees people he knows, he runs to them with his tail up."
After Kyle spends his morning patrolling the railway station, he heads off to his second job greeting the staff at nearby Gartnavel Hospital. He's become so popular in fact that he's been given the official title of Honorary Purrrfessor of Gartnavel Hospitals, which comes with a very fancy ID badge.
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Kyle has many friends at the hospital, mostly in the Beatson West of Scotland Cancer Centre. He seems to be well taken care of by everyone who crosses his path.
"He's got a few women on the go at the hospital, he seems to be getting fed four times a day," said Hanlon. "He's a wee fat thing now."
Apparently when Kyle started his morning job at the railway station, he was quite small. But now that he's getting paid in treats, he seems as plump and happy as ever.
On his official Twitter page, which was started by an anonymous fan, people voted in a poll to crown him with the title The Cat Controller. You can keep up with all of his adventures by giving him a follow.
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Although railway and hospital staff have yet to spot Kyle's owner, they have noticed him wearing a collar a few times before shaking it off. Locals have also seen him scurrying off to somewhere dry when it starts to rain. So he does seem to have a home to go off to.
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Now that he has a position at the hospital, passengers at the railway are hoping for an official title and badge given by station staff.
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"Kyle really is the cat's pyjamas," a ScotRail Alliance spokesperson said of the kitty. "We're purr-ty pleased that there's a security 'catrol' taking place at all hours of the day to enhance our team's efforts. He does seem to spend a lot of time sleeping though. As for a name badge -- ours have pins, does he really want a piercing in order to sport it? Let's discuss over a hotdog."
Wow, if those cat puns are any indication of how much the staff cares about Kyle, he'll get a badge in no time.
He'll just have to stay awake long enough.
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